|Not that Timon|
Acts 6:5 says that Timon was among the seven men selected to be the first deacons of the Church. The word on the street was that he was later crucified in Corinth. And that's all there is to say about him.
|Alphege, with the axe than done him in|
|Hodie, non cras!|
Saint Expeditus might not even have been pious fiction; he was either an Armenian centurion who got martyred or he was just a misunderstood label on a package. It seems that a box of bones arrived in Rome in the fourth century. It was addressed to the Bishop and labeled "EXPEDIT." That was the Latin equivalent of writing EXPRESS MAIL on it, but then again, Expeditus was a real Roman name.
Although Expeditus is no longer an official saint, he's more popularly invoked than many of the real patrons. Folks turn to him when they need stuff in a hurry, and often buy little testimonials printed in local papers, as they do with Saint Jude. Like Saint Joseph for realtors, small statues of Expeditus are sold for racing stables, dashboards, and other such spots. In pictures, Expeditus is often crushing a crow with his foot. The crow is actually the Devil, who suggested that Expeditus postpone his conversion to Christianity. The crow is shown croaking "Cras," Latin for tomorrow. Expeditus declared, "I'll be a Chrisitan today (hodie)!" and promptly crushed the life out of the feathery little demon.